A Birthday and a Eulogy
Today would have been my father's 58th birthday. Instead, he is gone and I am still desperately trying to piece back together my absolutely shattered heart. It seems fitting that I share my inadequate eulogy for my father here today. I'm going to be spending the day with my husband, celebrating my father with a cake I baked for him on birthdays past--a chocolate cake with cherry pie filling and whipped cream. I can't say for sure that it was his favorite, but it was the cake he asked me for when he asked me to make him a cake. I'd also like to ask you to take a moment to remember to tell people that you love them because life is frequently unfairly short and you just cannot can't on getting another chance.
Larry Donaghy b. August 13, 1953 d. January 28, 2011
It's virtually impossible to sum up in a few short paragraphs all that my father was. He was 5'10", bald and bearded and heavily muscled in a way that only comes from manual labor. He had an insatiable desire for knowledge, a ridiculous love of practical jokes and an amazingly tender heart towards children and animals. He loved beer, Hawaiian shirts, jigsaw puzzles and mystery novels. He lived very simply and was generous almost to a fault. He hated to throw anything away if there was any chance that it might be used again in any way. He was also one of the most important people in my life; one of the guideposts by which I defined myself. Without him, I am missing a rudder.
My father had large, square hands. They were always calloused from working in the fields because he frequently eschewed the many pairs of gloves he owned. A normal day in my childhood could find him operating a sawmill, chopping wood, making hay, milking goats or doing any one of a million other farm chores. Most people would have called him a man's man, tough on the outside. What most people didn't know was the inside his heart melted for his three little girls and it was not uncommon to see him with his beard or what little hair he had held back by plastic barrettes, braided into many tiny braids or otherwise decked out sparkly little girl accessories. He loved to tease and torment us; he would shake his wet beard over us after a shower or throw his stinky socks at us at the end of the day. One day when a friend was over, he was expounding on the joys of being an adult as he passed around that evening's dessert--swiss cake rolls or some other Little Debbie snack cakes--and without warning he reached out and BANG! slammed his hand down on the friend's cake, telling her he could do that because he was an adult, and that was what made being an adult great. He did also swap her mangled cake for his.
My father sang to us a great deal. While he did not sing outside the house and I can't recall the way it sounded when he sang now, I know he sang a lot. The song I most remember him singing to me was You Are My Sunshine, which has always made me cry. He would wake us up on summer mornings by bellowing "Rise and shine and give God your glory glory", his rich, round voice refusing to allow us to remain sleeping. He sang songs while we worked, teaching us to use them to work on the same rhythm. Frequently sung songs also included Lou Reed's Walk on the Wild Side and Stealers Wheel's Stuck in the Middle With You. He was a terrible dancer, but he did a great deal of that around the house too, doing what we all affectionately called "the white man shuffle." He loved the song The Safety Dance, and when we played it at my wedding, he made a point of telling me--as he grinned--that he was so glad I'd played "his song." He loved The Grateful Dead, Bob Dylan, Warren Zevon, Lou Reed, The Byrds, Flat and Scruggs, Arlo Guthrie and loved rock, old country, bluegrass and jazz in general.
My father was not always the most patient of men. Sometimes we argued and sometimes we yelled. I did inherit my stubborn nature from him, so it's only natural that we butted heads every now and then. The greatest gift he ever gave me was that I have always known that my father was behind me, proud of me and ready to catch me if I fell. Even as he kept his worries and sadnesses from us, he was free with his love, hugging and telling us he loved us as frequently as he could. A phone call to him could stretch for hours. The last thing he said to me was "I love you" and as I struggle through my life without him, I can think of no better gift he could have given me.
Happy birthday Daddy. I love you more than words can say, and for you, one last time, The Safety Dance.
excerpted and adapted from a post at Letters to my Father
Spring is for Spinning Part 2
It's been awhile since part one but I wanted to share the trio of 3ply handspun yarns that I finished on my last spinning kick. I wanted to get these up because I'll be spinning a lot in July since Tour de Fleece starts in just a few days. I've been participating in Tour de Fleece at a varying level since 2006 when Star coordinated her first one on craftster.org and her blog. At any rate, I have big plans for the Tour so hopefully there will be more handspun to talk about soon.
The first and second of these yarns was spun by splitting the top into three equal pieces and plying them together. The third yarn was intended to be spun as one continuous single and navajo plied but I was too far in when I realized the first half of the skein would be quite different from the second so I wound the singles into three wee cakes and then plied the three together. This was kind of frustrating and not something I would recommend. I'd probably wind them onto bobbins/toilet paper tubes if I needed to do it again. All of the yarns are a sport/dk weight.
First up, 4 ounces of merino in "Hotness" from Funky Carolina. I love Funky Carolina. She's a total sweetheart of a person and takes a lot of pride in her business. Additionally, her colorways are phenomenal and her fibers are well prepped and spin like a dream. This top was no exception.
Secondly, 4 ounces of 21.5 micron merino in "Northern Pine" from Black Trillium, a Portland indie dyer. She mostly dyes yarns but her fiber is really awesome and less expensive than many other places I've come across. Again, beautiful colorways; she has a lot of gorgeous semi-solid colored yarns that make my heart go pitter-patter.
And the third. This is 4 ounces of Targhee, in club colorway Woodstock from Crown Mountain Farms. I've been a long time customer of CMF, and Klaus is having a lot of fun with the club. This is normally a much more variegated roving than I would pick up so I wasn't entirely sure how to go about spinning it without turning it to mud, so I spun straight from the top without splitting it in any way. I'm very pleased with the results, it's unexpected but gorgeous. I feared I would end up with something so clown barf-y that I'd never have any idea what to do with it.
I also spun a 4 ounce skein from a gradient batt but I fought it the entire way so I'm calling a mulligan on that one and not devoting any more of my energy to it.
Spinning 1-2-3
One: batts from Rainbow Yarns NW purchased at Black Sheep Gathering 2008. 60% pygora (a cross between a pygmy goat and an angora goat) and 40% silk.
Two: Singles on a bobbin.
Three: two ply lace yarn. 2.3 ounces and about 315-320 yards.
Personal note: It's kind of a stressful time here at casa de baya. We're in the process of sleep testing to determine if my husband does indeed have the sleep apnea we think he does. Because one of his symptoms is really loud, constant snoring we're both left exhausted and a bit stressed out by every day's to-do list. We'd welcome any good thoughts you can send our way for a speedy treatment for the issue, we're both really itching for a really great night of sleep. And you know, I'd like to make it to our third anniversary without smothering in his sleep--sleep deprivation induced insanity is a crazy thing.*
*of course I am not going to smother him. But seriously, sleep deprivation makes everything so much more difficult.
A Day at the Fair, Miscellany
At the Lane County Fair, I saw:
A dress suited for Miss Frizzle:
A Whale Made From a Twinkie:
Ferris Wheel:
Twinkle-y Lights:
101 in 1001
I am 994 days shy of turning 30. In order to celebrate that milestone, I decided to embark on 101 in 1001. For 1001 days I will attempt to accomplish 101 goals, ranging in size from small (visit the beach) to much larger scale (buy a house, launch my professional website). This blog post is a week behind my actual 1001 days schedule, because last weekend was exhausting and the list was harder to write than I thought it would be.
Why am I doing this? Because I work well with deadlines. By setting these goals and keeping the list where I can see it frequently, I'll be reminded of these things I want to do. I'm hoping it will also help me celebrate the time I have left in my twenties. It just seems like the right thing for me to do.
Accountability. I'll be marking things off the list as I accomplish them, and blogging those accomplishments. In the end though, my real hope is to create some inspiration for myself, and to reconnect with a part of me that frequently feels very far away these days.